Why post-secondary education is overrated| My experience

**Disclaimer; I am not bashing against thoses educations in this post. I have a college diploma myself, and have nothing against it — Just a reminder that being a so-call “drop-out” or having “unnecessary” diploma isn’t a shame and is totally fine. I am also sharing my own story.**

 

This post actually came alive at work; for thoses of you who just stumbled around here – I am currently working as a Barista in a canadian brand’s coffee shop while having successfully completed an accounting college diploma in 2014.

Myself and my coworker was talking about how her uni courses was hard to manage along with working with us and at some point I said I had the diploma. Her response? «Wtf you doing here, then??».

People are so quick to judge as it’s nowadays society’s norm to have post-secondary education, So i’ve wanted to share my story. College or uni might not be for everyone; always keep your mind open.


I was a grade-A student, though I was part of the gang who did great without needing to study as much as the other’s – which pissed my buddies off sometimes.

At the time of finishing my high school education, I was 17. I had absolutely no idea where I wanted to go in life, still doesn’t at 24, but thought why not go for accounting as I had took a course on it and liked it. So I thought “well, why not”. The studying itself isn’t the issue – I LOVED my course. I even got merits as I had an everage of 85% throughout the entirety of my studies, which was two years.

The bad stuff happened afterward.

 

My mental health took a big hit when I found my first job in my field. I had gotten it as a Senior Accountant asked my teacher if she recommended some of the newly graduated, and she had given my name.

I was freshly out of college; had the theories, of course, but no real idea of how it was even interpreted in real life. It was a restoration franchise where I had no support at all – the boss of the office didn’t knew NOTHING and frankly didn’t cared much for the accounting, while the senior accountant had lot of clients to go help as it was year’s end paperasse. I was completely alone in an office, with nobody to even tell me what I was suppose to do, with the usual people calling to get their money. Some of them wasn’t even for us actually- as it was for the old franchise’s account, so there was nothing we could even do as it wasn’t us who had gotten the services or goods, but you see.. they can still be quite aggressive and will try anyway.

I stayed from June to December; so a total of six month. It was a 24/7 business, so I was expected to work on christmas and stuff and got told “i was lucky to even do 8-4” as you know, he could’ve get calls in the middle of the nights (I was like, secretary mixed with the accounting).

 

I overlooked the signs of being unhappy when I shouldn’t had; I kept brushing them off telling myself it wasn’t so bad and just stop being oversensitive. I was always lost of what I was even doing, mixed with harrassment from the suppliers and had no help even though I had requested it; I was to the point of even wondering if I had even learned ANYTHING in college. I had the urge to cry every. single. day. upon only entering the door. Even cried at my desk multiple times. but when it was passed, I just told myself all was fine and I was just.. emplifying things.

I was not. after enduring it for a few month I had enough and gave my notice – I had wanted to stay proper and give 2weeks, but I just couldn’t anymore. I had gotten my limit. The boss promised me he’d do his best to find someone quick, and later that day telling me I shall train a girl off what I was doing that end of week and I could go.

 

That’s when I had my first panic attack. I had everything ready for my leave and it was pay day, so we had called him for a question where he just told me; ah and btw, you need to stay. I told him I had all ready so like… should’ve had told me earlier. He laugh at me saying it was 2weeks needed of notice and something else I forgot.

I hang up the phone unable to speak as I knew I would’ve had overflowned with tears. I still had the other lady with me, and I was just hysterically crying while hyperventilating; unable to breathe properly. She tried to calm me down and I somehow identified and asked if it was a panic attack, she said yes. Later my psychiatrist asked me how I knew what it was, as usually upon first meet people usually think they are doing a heart attack; I have no idea, I just instinctly knew it.

Later that day, the boss finally came (late) to the office to sign the pay cheques. I waited everyone was gone and, while crying, said I was quitting – I was sorry I couldn’t do this anymore- and threw the office’s key on the desk. He just chuckled at me crying and said “‘Kay”.


Granted my story isn’t about the education itself, but that’s where all my life changed. I spent the next months awake at night fearing he might come get me and bring me to work, or force me in some ways to do the 2weeks. I stayed unemployed to have psychologist appointments every week for 8months; at 18 years old. I also had stomach problems caused by anxiety where I couldn’t keep anything down and lost 10pounds in the span of a week – never got them back until last year after I got my job at the sex shop and began to be really happy again.

I tried one last time within my course’s job later with my dad’s good friend, but had to quit as his wife’s was always on my back and I had huge migraines, which was probably caused by stress; leaving me unable to properly work with numbers without doing any mistakes.

 

I then choosed to not pursue with it, thus having a diploma and a remaining loan to pay “for nothing”. This field is actually a hard one, I falled on a bad experience but mostly all employers in that field want you to do ALL THE THINGS without being properly payed for and stuff just to have less employees to pay; and I just don’t have the strenght needed to face the surrounding of it anymore.

On bad days i’m still hard on myself for not having been tough enough to have handled it, as you can probably tell, the pay is so much more nicer than minimum wage’s job. But I wasn’t happy and sickened myself. The sex shop I worked for was the best job of my life, the greatest accomplishment for me was to being able to help customers get what they really needed.

 

If you aren’t happy with what you are studying for, or had changed your mind and not wanna go with what you finished anymore; please, quit it.

I know people are quick to judge knowing you dropped out or have three different diplomas just sitting there or whatever, but I assure you it isn’t worth it. Sure, money is one thing; more hours or a second one shall be needed. But if I had learned and haven’t passed over my limit, my life may would’ve been different now. I won’t tell you I wouldn’t have thoses mental illnesses now, as i’m sure I did from younger age, but that was the turning point of no return for them. The moment from when they needed to be managed.

Next time someone tell you they have a diploma they aren’t using, or have dropped out, please be more caring. It may not be as “in dept” as mine is, but many different reasons may have been in caused; this had just been mine.

0 comments

  1. Well Kristina let me say two things: thanks for sharing and you were very courageous to take that decision! I can totally relate with you here because the world we are living in is a tough one! I work in finance and they really do push people to their limit! I think it’s completely unnecessary to put such pressure on employees they won’t work better if they are stressed! On the contrary. That’s why I took three weeks off work now and need breather from time to time. I do love my job and my colleagues but the contexte and pressure …not so much! I also understand tha you want to go for something totally different because we are not one dimensional and usually have multiple talents. And promise I am not judging 😉

    1. Thank you! 💜

      That world wasn’t for me at all – and saying I was unhappy was truly an understatement. I went as far as wishing illness upon myself to escape 😪 that young and not knowing what to do or where to turn had me feeling trapped.

      I hope you feel so much better now that you’re taking your break! Xx

  2. It takes so much courage to make a big decision like that… I’m in a position where I’m not always that happy either. I won’t let myself quit because I studied 8 years for it and I’m in the middle of getting another diploma, but maybe I’ll start working a day less, next year 🙂 I do hope that gives me more peace of mind.

    1. I get what you are saying; we wont always be happy all the time. However, there’s a difference between normal “off days” sad and real toxic all the time sadness like I had.

      You only can take the decision and know which one it is ; but I do hope working a day less will do the trick for you ! xx

  3. I feel you so hard right now. I was never sure what I wanted… I started Philology but changed to Journalism. I had a huge crisis and wanted to study Translation but I ended up finishing Journalism even though I did not completely like it. Now I am looking for a job but I really don’t want to work on journalism I just can’t deal with the way it works in my country and I have gotten very anxious and stressed because of my family too. I just know I adore languages, music and books and I do enjoy to write. I want to write books too.But right now I haven’t found a job about this kind of stuff and I am very anxious. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

    1. This is why I wanted to share my story so much, thank you xx

      You don’t need to choose right now, we have all our lifes ahead of us! It’s totally fine to have made errors and « spent » money on something we end up not liking so much, we learned it wasn’t for us and we can try again with something else on another time. Try to find youself some « basic » job that you enjoy, and learn more about yourself and what youd wanna do with your life.

      Goodluck my dear! I sincerely hope you find a job real soon xx one that you’ll enjoy, it does make a big difference. Hugs xx

  4. Wow Kristina, how brave! Walking away must of been hard but I’m so glad you did. A close friend had panic attacks and she tells me they are scary. She got help and a better understanding of her body and mind. Sometimes finding yourself means taking an unconventional path. Do what’s best for you. A great article everyone should read. ❤️❤️

    1. Thank you Dani 💜
      The worst about panic attacks is you cant really do anything, really. It’s your brain agaisnt yourself .. just need to wait for it to pass ..

  5. big mood.
    i keep getting forced to look into jobs for what i studied and every time the clients try and walk all over me and ignore when i say what i am available for. its so disheartening and ruined my enjoyment of being creative. tahts why i like my bujo bc it allows me to have some creativity without any stress

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