Again with books from the library that actually was on my “virtual wanna read” rather than my actual owned TBR 🙈
Dani’s review was the one to make me wanna read it this time. I also grew to quite like titles like that “My __ and other ___”.
4 / 5 stars
Triggers; Suicide (idealizations, attempts & planning), Death, Grief, Depression
This book is quite far from what I Imagined.. sure, I knew it was “dark” as the synopsis is talking of suicide partners.. but I honestly wasn’t prepared for it to be as heavy! Though frankly I have no idea what I expected 😂 I wouldn’t say that i’m an “active” suicidal anymore; meaning that what’s left is mostly what i’ve trained my brain to react like, rather than a constant thought of it. Aysel’s way of just shrugging future deadlines with « It doesn’t matter as I won’t be there / don’t know where i’ll be then » is still very much how my brain still think of things.. so it resonated with me alot.
If at first the novel was way darker than I expected, it seemed to become a bit lighter as I went through the chapters and kept going. The further we go into the novel, we ask ourselves what will happen – will they stick to the plan, or will hope be enough to save them both ?
I honestly didn’t thought i’d like it as much as I did, from first glance. I had thought of dropping it and switching book early in the chapters; but I just kept going instead. There’s just something with Aysel’s change of character and the turns of events that kept me reading WAY after the hour that I should’ve had stopped to sleep.
I grew to really love Roman, and like every book I seems to be reading, a part of some of his actions made me think alot of Alex. They both felt so realistic and genuine characters- especially Aysel with her passion of physics. I also couldn’t help from not wanting to finish the book – although I wished as hard as I could that it wouldn’t end like the premise of the book (so, their joined suicide) I also didn’t wanted to continue and find out the slight chance that it still might end up exactly like that. I just wanted thoses character to stay like that forever, with no real ending!!
That concept of a website to “help” with the act is something i’ve read before in I was there by Gayle Forman; but this time we are taken on the other side of the medal. The MC being the one actually using it.
Having had a mental health issue, I know the challenge it is to read about something that’s truly a trigger/anxiety inducing topic. I really respect that you’ve read this and you’re spreading word about it. Mental health is important. Awareness all the more.
Thank you – Happy you loved my review!
I absolutely agree with you !
Awwww I’m so glad you were able to push through Kristina!! I agree that this was hard to read at first but just like you I grew to love the characters and to feel the hope Aysel started to feel. Things don’t end as perfectly as its portrayed in real life but books have to end so in that moment I believe she was willing to live!! ❤️ Great, great review!!
Aww thank you! ❤️
It’s a nice turn of events, it gets to show you that sometimes anything in life can get your will to live and/or hope! You don’t necessarely see it coming, at all.
Holy cow this sounds like an intense read! And I’m glad it wasn’t something that was horrible for you and that carrying through, it ended up being worth the read! It really sounds great, but may be the sort of book I’ll have to wait to be in the right mood to read, great review!
Oh yeah, absolutely!
That’s the case with most mental health related books.. as you see their « toxic » thoughts at first before it gets better. Which is quite crude and dark… you need to be able to handle them.
Thank you! Xx
Great review! Added to my TBR mountain. Just gotta be in the right frame of mind to read it.
yess !! so good to hear 😄 Within the right frame of mind, this was such a good book !