Which do you prefer; reading your current «mood», or something totally different?

Good morning!

Note that we aren’t talking mood like “mood reading” here, actually for once; I’m talking mood as in «state of mind», the current emotions you are feeling inside you.

Related; Do you prefer to « re-live your experiences » in books, or stay away from them?.

Firstly, I always want my books to make me feel stuff; wether it’s happy or sad, Ithink it’s the best thing ever to get words. On paper. Affecting you that much..

As of which! To make every one of us feel better: although the deaths are of fictional characters, i’ve read somewhere that your brain *doesn’t know that* thus treating it like it’s happening in real life. So yes, it is real emotions although the characters who died aren’t real.

Being a mood reader, I can however see that the way i’m feeling is tightly influencing which books i’m in the mood to pick. Maybe due to the fact that I love to make myself suffer, *aherm*..

⇒ When i’m feeling down, i’m more often than not gonna pick something with a raw emotion and a “sad” quotation to it… Cue in all the books dealing with mental health & suicide thoughts, per exemple, or books that deals with some sort of loss: friend, lover, parent(s)..

⇒ On the contrary, when i’m feeling more happier, I’m gonna pick some fluffy contemporary romance. Or basically anything that has the potential to make me feel all lovey dovey and really dreaming.

⇒ The exception that prove the rule, like they say, there will be faint times that I will pick something on the total opposite of what i’m feeling. The only real exemple I have for this one; when I got broken up with, I decided to pick a happier romance book.. in a try to kind of focus more on cheering myself up and  see that love is still out there?

Ithink one of the reasons that my brain is doing this particular “torture” type thing, beside you know- hurting me ahah, is that sometimes my feelings gets kinda stuck inside. Like right now I feel so anxious about everything and generally in a bad shape emotionally that I know the best way to make me feel better would probably be to have a good cry BUT I just can’t get myself to exteriorize it.

So having to consume medias like books or musics that makes me feel deeply help me get out all the tears and stuff that is all stuck inside me. But in a different way; where I wouldn’t necessarely cry about my specifics.. but start the flow by making me react to something fictional – feeling for something outside of myself. And then once it’s open, everything can freely jump out of the train 😅 Does it make sense?

Do you read how you feel or go the complete opposite instead?