Good morning!
By now, I have gotten used to the feeling of needing to upgrade or change anxiety medication (I personally take antidepressants, that works for both my anxiety and depression) as I sortof regress in the way i’m feeling and things start to get darker again.
However- as I was reading Unfuck your anxiety.. I’ve start wondering, when do you know if you’re ready to go down or eventually stop medication altogether?
One of the things that my doctor used to tell me, and still do whenever I go for a new yearly prescription, is how often people tend to see the medication working and jump start quitting because “That’s it, i’m better now!”. When actually, it’s the worst thing to do, as the way you are feeling better is exactly the medication working – that it’s okay that we need them and that there’s no shame in staying on them for as long as we need.
My journey with medication started early at only 19years old, which was nearly a decade ago now.. I got lucky, as my antidepressant started working on my 3rd try I believe- I started on citalopram, upgraded it, but then as I couldn’t go higher safely for my weight, my dr prescribed me ventalofaxine instead. That was half of the fight, as we noticed it got worst at the month’s end when I was menstruating, my hormones wrecking havoc on my brain and unbalancing everything – so we switched my birth control pill.
Thanks to my mother for the imput that she noticed with my hormones, as she’s the one doing my weeks of medications, and ofcourse she was witnessing my spurt of angers and irritability. From there it went pretty smoothly, I has upgraded my antidepressor’s dosage once “for the winter”; which I ended up staying there up until covid happened where I needed to upgrade again. Which is fair considering we’re all in a garbage bin fire ever since.
I had a bit of a bump lately until spring started and I’m feeling much better now, but I also suspect I might be on the autism spectrum and have undiagnosed ADHD for sure – as it’s hereditary, my mother’s brother had been wrongfully diagnosed with anxiety to switch to ADHD, and it’s clear as rock water that my mother has it too.
The problem being.. what do I do with that information. Everything is well with my brain right now- so ofcourse I don’t wanna touch anything! Though I’m curious to actually get a proper diagnosis? but a decade of having known anxiety and depression- i’m wierdly attacked to those labels- what if it’s just a misdiagnosis? Would I need to change my meds although it’s working excellent?
And at last.. I’m tempted to just let my body be and remove everything- iguess just to see if my brain really is like that? Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE not having my menstruations at all for years, but as I grew up alot in a decade- it makes you wonder what would’ve changed. Would I be different?
We know so little about those most common ones.. although mainstreams, they still don’t know why the medications works, really, or the true why behind everything — and the most upsetting, is how we won’t get new medications as it’s now a cashcow for the pharmaceutical companies. They all started as meant for something else, was rubbish at it, and magically worked on anxious/depressed people!
I consider myself very lucky to have had a quite easier path than others, easier than it could’ve had been – medications aren’t tested on female bodies either, so they aren’t truly aware of how our bodies are to react to them. Mine is pretty good at taking them and working as it should, with very few side effects.
What was your experience?
When did you knew it was time to downgrade/stop them?